George asks…

Can you give me your opinion on this part of the story I wrote?

I want to be somebody else.

Chapter 1.
I don’t want to be myself. Why would I? Why would an ugly, 15 year old High School girl want to be herself. I bet you can’t think of any reason either. I don’t blame you. I have the lowest self esteem in the world, but hey, when you walk in the school’s halls, seeing the preppy, high self-esteem cheerleaders, walking as if they had just won the lottery, flirting with those cute, football player senior boys, it’s quite difficult not to envy them. They look like they have everything. Tons of friends, always incredibly dressed with the latest trends, beautiful make-up and hot boyfriends. And me, here I am, sitting there, looking at them. I have always been way too shy to approach guys, or even talk to them. All I have is one single friend.

Thanks!
I SAID THIS PART OF THE STORY NOT THE WHOLE STORY. DIDNT YOU READ THE QUESTION???

Chris answers:

Very good. It read nicely. The only thing I got caught up on was one of the last lines where you say “here I am….sitting there”….The here and there don’t really flow like the rest of your paragraph.

As far as content ….very very nice…about a 8 out of 10 from me. Maybe add a line or two contrasting what the preppy girls are saying to themselves (ie their self-talk) and contrast it to your self-talk..something like….. They say: “Wow! It feels so good to have everybody looking at me!” You’d say: “Wow! I hope nobody sees me…what am I saying? Nobody notices me anyway.”

The last line “All I have is one single friend” doesn’t really fit… Maybe if you add, “Well, at least I have one friend I can count on.”

Very good….were you inside my head when I was in high school?

Oh…and you probably already know this but be sure somebody checks for proper grammar. I think high school should not be in caps.

Try replacing your text with this: ….always dressed incredibly well with the latest trends……

And…perhaps…….it’s quite difficult to not envy them…..

Replace with this: “they look like they have everything” And just say “they have everything!”

Replace with this: And me. With And then there is me! Here I am. Just sitting, waiting for a miracle, watching.

Keep up the good work…hope you understand my tips….you are a great writter….keep it up!

William asks…

Arsenal made contact with Everton…?

I’d pretty much bet on your life (Win-win ;) that it was for Baines… I like Baines and think he’d be an ideal replacement for Clichy (I’d say it’s likely he’ll leave this Summer… not for 5 million though. If Liverpool are overpaying for Homegrown players, Clichy is also Homegrown, then they’d have to overpay for him as well judging by their recent trend…)

Baines is the best attacking LB in the League… Clichy is the best defensively… and Enrique is the jack of all trades, master of none… Cole isn’t the player he used to be and Evra is entering the twilight of his career now… so it’s between them 3…

Though, converting Vermaelen to LB seems Wenger-ish… I don’t want Cahill really. Prefer to bring in Baines (If Clichy is sold) and stick with Samba-Vermaelen in CB… seems like a brilliant partnership… especially if Djourou and Koscielny are covering… that kind of cover is excellent, in my opinion… contrary to what most think, apart from a couple of prolific c0ck ups, I think Koscielny has had a brilliant first Season in English Football… single-handedly manned the barricades against Barca… and Djourou was immense until the last few games of the Season… which is understandable, the lad was knackered… Djourou-Koscielny have a brilliant partnership as well and both have the potential to get better…

Chris answers:

I do not think we will get both Cahill and Samba, Samba is cheaper and better. I would not agree in saying that Cahill is over rated as he has a lot of strong points.

Surely Wenger knows that Vermaelen isn’t a left back, he is our best defender, even if we do sign Samba. I would still also have faith Kos and Djourou like you said, Djourou however does lose concentration and although he looks like a comanding defender he still seems like a little kid.

Now getting on the Leighton Baines, i believe he was one of the best players last season, he has got more assists and goals combined over the last 2 seasons than Bale has got in his whole career at Spurs. Which is pretty impressive for a full back. I think he is very much an Arsenal full back and his crossing could really help Chamakh get more goals, now we have two good crossers on both sides.

Also he is good from set pieces which means we won’t have to send RVP to take them, he isn’t the best header of a ball i have seen but he is decent and with Baines’ delivery he may get more goals with his head or at least it would be something to practice on.

As for Clichy, in the 07-08 season he was the best left back in the premier league if not the world for that season, he was absolutely immense, but i do not think Wenger wants to rely on him anymore, he is always caught napping and playing people on side. It would be a shame to lose our last memeber of our invincables, even though he only played a few games.

Sharon asks…

Why do Pro Basketball players, Baseball players, and Football players, shave their arms these days?

Hell even Brett Michaels Shaves his arms and other rock stars hell I bet even video gamers Shave their arms, Is this A Big trend?

Chris answers:

Yes, unfortunately manscaping has gone overboard, they probably think it will help aerodynamically, but in basketball they wear those super baggy shorts, anything but aerodynamic. It probably started with pro wrestlers, they all shave.

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